Update

Well, I don't hate New York as much as I have been in the past few weeks. There are so many good snacks here and after all, it is the birthplace of Hip Hop. And there are infinite things to do. Even at 2 a.m. you can get a gourmet meal or a pedicure, or something. It is, however, very fucking cold. The kind that hurts your face. I've never previously owned a scarf before, but I am now very much a pro-scarf man. One must also own a very heavy-duty parka, a knit cap and long johns. That's right, I said parka and I also said long johns. Parka, meaning big fucking coat. Merriam-Webster describes it as "a hooded pullover garment for arctic wear." Arctic, y'all! As for the long johns, let's just say that the fierce NY wind laughs at your paltry H&M jeans. Every so often I'll see a guy on the street wearing one of those ski masks. Now, it is cold, but c'mon dude! Unless you're robbing a liquor store or robbing a bodega or chopping hookers into little pieces with a cleaver, don't wear one of those. Ski mask does not say to me, "that guy is trying to keep his face warm." It says to me, "that guy is wanted in at least 3 states for various crimes." So, Mr. ski mask wearer, do like the rest of us and bare your grill. It only takes about a half hour for your facial muscles to defrost upon entering a building anyway.